Walls. Can protect us. Can defend us. Can isolate us.
Many of us build walls. Visible walls. And, yes, invisible walls too.
Wall we see with our bare eyes tells us there is something behind it. Something we will never see unless we get the privilege of entering the enclosure. Unless such enclosure is made of clear glass, we won’t see what’s behind. But then again, even if glass is clear, we won’t be able to reach the one behind it if their choice is to stay ironically afar.
Life tells us that there are people we know who build walls around them. Though invisible to the naked eye, the wall is there.
Sadly they who build such walls cannot receive support from others and cannot give to others as much as well.
Why? Because others cannot feel the pains of the one who isolates, thus empathy cannot be given; love cannot be shared. The isolated cannot receive nor give love as much as when there are no walls.
To isolate is to hide; to not show what’s in our hearts; to separate from others; to choose to be alone and refuse to receive support, emotionally or morally.
Woe to the one who would rather withdraw from the rest, unwilling to be vulnerable when vulnerability is actually a strength.
When someone I care about withdraws, to either go deep inside a shell or build walls that get layer by layer thicker everyday like a fortress, I am concerned.
And when it gets to that point that my gesture of caring is ignored, it signals me to simply stop showing I care.
As a friend, I know I do my part reaching out.
But I know my act of concern is not needed when I’m ignored and so I stop showing care and start watching from afar.
Maybe that’s the best way to go for now. I will wait until my friend, who I know is in pain, wakes up to the reality one day that isolation cannot heal.
Live your heart,
Joji
